According to the Congressional Directory, one of the things the government spends your money on is an office devoted to negotiating the status of Micronesia. I'm not saying its employees are goofing off: I'm sure they get up early in the morning, negotiate the status of Micronesia all day, then come home and collapse. I'm just saying that if they haven't been able to get Micronesia straightened out after all these years, then the hell with Micronesia.
- Dave Barry