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-   -   Trying to outsmart a squirrel (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=12602)

chrisinhouston 12-01-2006 12:14 PM

Trying to outsmart a squirrel
 
Last night when the Mrs and I turned in we heard something in the crawlspace part of the roof over our bedroom. It went on for an hour or so before the visitor decided to turn in for the night. We agreed it must be a squirell that had found a way into the attic. As I fly back to Atlant on Saturday, my wife left with explicit instructions to do something about it.

So I spent an hour or so inspecting the overhangs of our roof and finally found a neatly carved entry point right under the soffit overhang. How the little bastard was able to hang on upside down and eat through the 1/2 inch plywood soffit I'll never figure out.

So I put up the extension ladder and took a scrap of wood, the cordless drill and some drywall screws and plugged the hole. I mean, afterall it's a beautiful day here after a crappy one so most squirells with any sense are out feeding or playing or sunning themselves, right?

I got on the computer and after awhile I here him in the attic above my office, so I go and get my pellet gun. This isn't any average Daisy Red Rider, it's a fancy ass German marksman model that shoots those lead pellets and has the stopping power just shy of a 22! I open the attic door and THERE HE IS! But I couldn't get the gun shouldered before he disappeared behind the furnace. I just spent close to 10 grand on a new AC and furnace system so shooting from the hi[ in the general direction of my new furnace was not an option

So I went outside and up the ladder and removed the patch, now that I knew he was in there I realized without an escape route he be in there for good. Then I got the pellet gun and doned my camo hunting jacket (nice and warm as well as good cover). I picked a spot in the garden out in front of my house and sat down. Now at this point I have no idea if he slipped out while I was grabbing my gear inside but decided it was worth a wait.

About an hour went by and I was reminded of how much we miss when we aren't paying attention and in a hurry outside or just inside the house. Several squirells bounced from tree to tree but I don't think either was the one in the attic, too big. I pondered what were the odds that he was still in the attic waiting for enough time to pass to escape. Some large vultures flew overhead, a male cardinal chased a female.

No luck, I think I'll try again later this afternoon. This is kind of a fun way to waste my day! :p

Oh and we definately have grey squirells here in Houston!

Shawnee123 12-01-2006 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chrisinhouston
No luck, I think I'll try again later this afternoon. This is kind of a fun way to waste my day! :p

Oh and we definately have grey squirells here in Houston!

LOL, why am I having images of Carl Spackler?

Elspode 12-01-2006 01:01 PM

Dude...bad news. If you've got a bunch of squirrels, even if you knock out the I'm Alright rodent, another will just occupy his niche. That's ecology for ya.

chrisinhouston 12-01-2006 04:19 PM

Well, I think I may have won round one.

Upon returning from lunch with my wife I saw the smallish squirell sitting on the edge of the roof as we entered the driveway, luckily he sprinted over the roof rather then ducking back into the attic.

I proceeded to don my camo parka (brown wetland grass patern), grab my gun and find a comfy spot leaning against a big pine tree. I figured I'd wait and see if either the creature returns or another one emerges.

I waited peacefully for an hour and watched countless squirells chasing each other from tree to tree and even had a few come with in 20 feet, but as I could not 100% ID the culprit I let them go; I'm not completely morally bankrupt.

After an hour and my leg going to sleep, I climbed the ladder in hopes that the attic is empty and attached 2 scraps of English Walnut (left over from an old attempt at furniture repair). At least the walnut should be harder then the ceder siding or the plywood.

:cool:

chrisinhouston 12-10-2006 09:55 AM

My wife phoned me yesterday (I'm back at my parent's house in Atlanta) to report she heard squirrels in the attic again. I told her to go look where I had boarded up the whole near the roof. She reported that they have made a new hole through the wood and that while watching she saw 4 squirrels come out of the hole.

I think we have some kind of mutant part beaver squirrels! :eek:

xoxoxoBruce 12-10-2006 10:48 AM

Well, they chew through nuts....a board is a minor inconvenience. ;)

lumberjim 12-10-2006 11:09 AM

steel wool.

or treat the wood with poison.

or...wait until they're in there, attach a trap to the outside, then scare them into it from inside.


also, jinx says......just shoot one, and put it's head on a spike near the hole as a warning.

Gravdigr 04-22-2011 02:58 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Momdigr was all: "How in the world did he know to take the top off? This is just amazing!"

Popdigr explained that's the only place the squirrel could smell the sunflower seeds that were inside, so that's where he chewed.

:D

GunMaster357 04-22-2011 07:38 AM

Some seeds with poison in the attic, maybe?

And, yes, I'm morally corrupted.


In case you've got children be very careful if you choose to employ this method.

wolf 04-22-2011 10:37 AM

Any attempt to outsmart squirrels is doomed to failure.

I'm tellin' yah, they're going to survive The Big One along with the roaches.

ZenGum 04-22-2011 09:53 PM

Outsmart squirrels?

You're nuts!

zippyt 04-22-2011 10:05 PM

rat poison works well

morethanpretty 04-22-2011 10:30 PM

If you want to outsmart something, you have to be at least 10% smarter than it.

Big Sarge 04-22-2011 11:12 PM

it's pretty easy to get rid of them. get a 5 gallon can of gas and pour it all around your attic. let it soak into your insulation. next time you hear the little f'ers, toss a match in the attic. problem solved!!!

ZenGum 04-23-2011 09:44 PM

Why wait? Just burn down your house now. That'll stop the little bastards.

HungLikeJesus 04-24-2011 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum (Post 726138)
Outsmart squirrels?

You're nuts!

Especially squirell nutkin.

squirell nutkin 04-24-2011 07:42 PM

ha ha!

Bitches!

monster 04-24-2011 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by morethanpretty (Post 726161)
If you want to outsmart something, you have to be at least 10% smarter than it.

85% of squirrel problems are directly attributable to top storey mismanagement

ZenGum 04-24-2011 08:25 PM

:D

Happy Monkey 04-25-2011 12:24 PM

You can't outsmart a squirrel, because no matter how much smarter you are, the squirrel will devote 100% of its life to winning.

Like Charlie Sheen.

monster 04-25-2011 05:38 PM

Do they sell their blood?

TheMercenary 04-25-2011 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum (Post 726495)
Why wait? Just burn down your house now. That'll stop the little bastards.

"You insensitive bastard! I haz a depressive condition that makes me want to burn squirrels."

:lol:

squirell nutkin 04-25-2011 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster (Post 727031)
Do they sell their blood?

No, but I will loan you some plasma if you promise not to stretch it out.

monster 04-25-2011 10:26 PM

I will promise no such thing

squirell nutkin 04-25-2011 10:45 PM

I just remembered, I sent my plasma to the cleaners, so it's a moot point.

plthijinx 04-26-2011 03:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happy Monkey (Post 726869)
You can't outsmart a squirrel, because no matter how much smarter you are, the squirrel will devote 100% of its life to winning.

Like Charlie Sheen.

or kinda like a prison inmate. mcgyver be damned! we did it! if one didn't know how, the other could invent a way it could be!

(psssst, poison em!)

Glinda 04-26-2011 10:42 AM

Nah. Just get one of these...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBb7KReY6Eg

monster 04-26-2011 11:55 AM

Is that the squirrelapult? I'm afraid to click it.....

plthijinx 04-26-2011 12:02 PM

yeah on the snow covered balcony...classic vid!

Glinda 04-26-2011 12:16 PM

I particularly enjoy the music it's been set to. *evil grin* I want to meet those people and roast a hobo with them, or something.


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