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-   -   Getting Old (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=32341)

xoxoxoBruce 11-27-2016 09:20 AM

Getting Old
 
From GQ, a 78 year old man tells it like it is.

Quote:

Last month my dad turned seventy-eight years old. A few days before his birthday, I drove down to San Diego to see him.

“What do you want for your birthday,” I asked, as we sat in his living room.

“I want to talk to you about something. Let’s take the dog for a walk,” he said, as he grabbed a leash that sat next to his recliner. “You take the shit bag,” he added, handing me a bundled up plastic baggy.

We headed up his quiet suburban street as his large brown Rottweiler mix walked ahead.

“The human body wasn’t meant to live this long,” he said.

“Seventy-eight is not that old,” I replied.

“Do we have to sit here and dignify a clearly horseshit statement such as that, or can you cease to pander to me and just have a conversation?”

“Okay. Seventy-eight is old.”

He hiked up his sweatpants and quickened the pace of our walk.

“I’m not complaining. I’m just saying people peddle this ridiculous idea that you can be an old person and go water skiing and fuck whenever you want and it’s bullshit. It’s fucking hubris that’s specific to humans and no other species,” he said, as he yanked the dog’s leash, pulling it away from the neighbor’s lawn right before it trampled their flowers.

“Well, the other option is to just accept that death is coming for you,” I replied.

“It is coming for you. You can’t beat death. It’s un-fucking-defeated. And if you fight it, it will humiliate you. It’ll chain you to a bed and make someone have to wipe your shitty ass. It’ll make you forget who your own fucking kids are. It takes your dignity and it whips its’ dick out and pisses on it. When you’re younger and it comes for you, it’s worth it to fight it and suffer through the humiliation. When you’re older, what the fuck does it get you to go through that?,” he said, then took a deep breath and stopped on the sidewalk.
more at the link.

Griff 11-27-2016 11:57 AM

Truth.

Gravdigr 11-27-2016 12:03 PM

Life's too short to drink cheap bourbon?

I kinda got lost at the end, there.

glatt 11-27-2016 12:08 PM

I've seen it up close twice now, and it's true.

Hospice care for me when I get old and sick. Fuck fighting the inevitable. Gotta take it on a case by case basis though.

elSicomoro 11-27-2016 02:14 PM

I don't want to cause an undue burden on my family when I start becoming a malfunction. I dunno...I figure if I die tomorrow, I've lived a damn good life with no regrets. But I certainly don't want to go anytime soon.

captainhook455 11-28-2016 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt (Post 974781)
I've seen it up close twice now, and it's true.

Hospice care for me when I get old and sick. Fuck fighting the inevitable. Gotta take it on a case by case basis though.

I hope I don't get dementia like my father. If I do and still have some sense then the best thing is to step out on a ledge and jump head first.

tarheel

Gravdigr 11-28-2016 01:59 PM

I ain't afraid to die (I don't think, reality may prove otherwise), but, I damn sure ain't in any hurry.

sexobon 12-28-2016 03:00 PM

Looks like the magic number to go for is 96; although, other numbers may work as long as you're young at heart:


xoxoxoBruce 12-28-2016 04:31 PM

My Mother died at 95, you insensitive bastard. :p: You're lucky it wasn't 9-11.

busterb 12-28-2016 08:56 PM

I guess Bruce and I are the two oldest goats around. I hate this tablet

sexobon 12-28-2016 09:09 PM

Try taking it with a glass of water. :p:

xoxoxoBruce 12-28-2016 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by busterb (Post 977754)
I guess Bruce and I are the two oldest goats around.

Hell no, you're eons older than moi.

BigV 12-28-2016 11:56 PM

Hi Buster

damn good to see you again!

fargon 12-29-2016 06:56 AM

Hi Buster, are you doing good?

classicman 12-29-2016 04:32 PM

Buster is back!!!! Yo. Where's muh fudge?


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