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Alcohol is useful 'cause...
...it extends lives. The average moderate drinker survives the average teetotaler by several years. Every single study has proven it. Historically, it has been one of the most-used medications, and saved many entire societies by being the primary beverage when other water sources were contaminated.
But perhaps the most useful function of alcohol is AS A DRUG. It provides what one might call "social lubrication", allowing people to gather and to lower their inhibitions just enough to become outgoing. So common is the human need for this, that in most areas it is hard to find a gathering where there is no alcohol.
Cocaine is useful because... hmmmm...
... I don't know. Never understood this one.
Heroin is useful because... uhhhhh.....
It's part of a family of drugs that provides pain relief. Probably has medicinal use in terminal patients, where you obviously don't care if they develop a dependence.
Psilocybin is useful because... well, dammit...
It probably has use within a structured framework of psychiatry. Otherwise, it is useful because people enjoy it.
Marijuana is useful because...
... it may be the most-used drug in the world by people who are self-medicating for mild clinical depression.
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