don't get discouraged, there was a thread here somewhere, about who plays music and why.. (although I don't have time to look for it now.) and to reiterate, it's more of a journey than a destiation.. although small milestones are a good way to go (okay, I'm going to learn X song this month etc.) fingers loosen up and if I may suggest, they sell finger strengtheners (also helps to eventually be able to differentiate one finger from the other.. yeah sounds simple enough... but it takes practice) which I highly recomend, since you can use them all the time at work, grocery shopping, watching TV whatever. as to reading music... my poor little lysdexic brain gave up on that years ago, however I don't seem to have a problem reading TAB (well... it is painfully simple..) anywhoo! keep yer chin up and your fingers stretched.
also here's a handy site for music stuff, tabs, lessons, pointers etc.
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com