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Originally Posted by glatt
Contessa's problem was that she was told as a child that she could grow up to do anything she wanted to do. She dreamed of being an Astronaut, or a Rock Star, or maybe even Prime Minister. But as she got older, she realized that some dreams are not meant to be. She could work as hard as she wanted to, and would still never become a Rock Star. It was too late for her.
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It was these words that led Contessa into a stream of denial. That is wrong, she thinks, because I
can do anything I want. I am capable, I am wise, and once I know what it is, I will pursue my dream relentlessly, and successfully. Contessa's mind is strong and she knows she has this power. She knows this because everything she tries she can do, and quickly, and better than others. She fears telling people of this power because they will mistake it for arrogance, or pity her impossible dreams. But quietly, inside, she knows it as truth.
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Originally Posted by glatt
Contessa is basing her happiness on others' opinions of her. As long as she chooses that as her goal, she has zero power of reaching her goal.
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Again, Contessa will argue. She believes that she does have control over other people, and has considered at length that she could
make them view her with respect. Her choices in career and her interests reflect this. She sees the susceptibillity of most people, how impressionable they are, and knows she can influence them.
The question arises, now, of whether she wants to influence, or coerce. This wouldn't be real, she considers, and would not gain me the truth I am after. This presents an awkward problem for Contessa - she knows, or thinks this to be an important truth, but does not know if she can make her consciousness accept it.
She settles herself somewhat unsatisfactorily with the notion that truth will prevail, and if she is as wise as she considers herself to be, realisation will be forthcoming.