Lucky me, I happen to love selling things, even if i'm not making any money off the sale. I just don't understand those people who look at you like you are making their lives unbearable. We are giving them money, for cryin' out loud. That would put a smile on my face any day. 
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Well, obviously no one is going to give you a nickel every time something common happens, so stop using that idiotic phrase.
Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished, persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.
-Mark Twain
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