Quote:
Originally posted by juju in another thread in his forum
Also, admit the possibility (however remote) that you might be wrong.
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This relationship might have been repaired and restored if you had drawn on one of the central things in your personal philosphy by admitting to Rita
you were wrong. I don't kow if you ever used the magic words to restore a relationship,
"I was wrong. You were right. I'm sorry."
You have written quite a long post, and I can't find that mentioned.
"I haven't made the best decisions ..." and "trusting Jay over Rita was just really fucking stupid" don't count, because those words don't work. "I was wrong" are the words that you seem to have difficulty with. Your
central philosophy as explained in another thread, might really be that
others should admit when
they're wrong. Even if they didn't in this case, maybe you should have. For your sake, not necessarily for theirs.
In this long piece, you blame Jay and you blame Rita. The only responsiblility you seem to put on yourself in all of this is that you are too [fill in some virtue that lays you bare to other's wrongs] trusting, honest, open, etc.
Maybe, I'm wrong about this, because you might have said, "I was wrong." to Rita, and just didnt' mention it here. Somehow, I doubt that you ever used those words in this relationship mess. Admit to yourself,
something you were wrong about in this (and not some ... I was wrong to have been so virtuous) and then admit that to Rita and say you're sorry and ask for her forgiveness. You may rediscover the relationship with her you want.