[Sun_Sparkz]

I wrote this after feeling a bit angry with some of the local farmers cuz they were giving me hell about some accounts i was calling them for (owing our company money). And i entered it (on a whim of the momento..) into a short story writing comp. on my favourite national radio station. it was an easy email entrant to easy to refuse. and there was a few ticker boxes waving your privacy right and they can use the story however they want ra ra ra. i thought theyd just delete it... Ive written better stories on the cellar for goodness sake.

I got a call last week from one of the judges saying she loved and and it was in the top 3 entrants!! i was shocked. now its gonna be online and on radio to be voted for. its just a rant. But worst of all.. all the locals here might here it and well.. slaughter me for baggin them!!

Have a read.. tell me honestly.. Am I Dead?!?!?

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"Friendly Country People"

Spending most of my life living on the beach orientated, relaxed central coast of Australia, when my Partner and I moved to the country in the beginning of 2005, numerous things about the way of life out here disturbed me, and set my perspective of these "country bumpkins" out the window.

Driving along the roads here I was constantly shocked to see the amount of road kill that had only been "injured" and still left to die, or the amount that had been hit, and left in the middle of the road, I cannot count the amount of close calls I have had because my 2 door excel has to swerve out of the road of a huge, 6 foot big red lying there on the road. And additionally, as I came to know many farmers and farmers alike, I was shocked at their treatment of their own animals. I mean.. I was raised to believe these country people lived for animals.. aren't animals the heart of the Australian bush? seemingly not. As I spent a little longer I realised the "fantasy" ideals I had carried with me from the coast, were soon to be squashed by the hardened morale of these countryites. I am now lead to believe that the heart of the Australian bush may just be XXXX, VB and talking rubbish with a "mate" who will buy you more XXXX and VB.

Upon first sight of so much animal disrespect I thought about how to change such a tragedy.. perhaps an advertising campaign? early childhood intervention? I even wrote a song about what to do if you hit a kangaroo. It could even be the next "fence the pool.. shut the gate"

*to the same tune*

"if you hit a roo, drag it off the road,

make sure its dead and check its pouch."

Can you just imagine John Howard demonstrating that one with 50 primary school kids surrounding him dong the actions of dragging a roo off the road. maybe we could accessorize with shovels?!

Also I would like to reinforce the fact that farm animals have feelings too. I am just a coastal girl after all is said and done, and my income relies on a rural real estate wage, but it definitely goes against all normality in my opinion to shear 100 sheep in crowded stock yard while about 15 of them are in the process of giving birth, so that almost every lamb born that day, or every other lamb under 1 moth old in the yard, is trampled to death, or at least some kind of death by its 100 "stupid" peers. Sheep aren't stupid. People are stupid, for putting them in dangerous situations.

Oh and for the "cowboys" = drive sensibly for gods sake. Turn OFF your high beams and 150 thousand mounted driving/ shooting lights when I pass you on the highway, and if you delight so much in shooting animals for fun on the weekends, please don't do it half cut on Tooheys and when you shoot it, KILL IT. And if you miss a vital point and its wriggling around, shoot it again!!

In conclusion, my experiences since moving to the country from the coast have only served to increase my love, and respect for our animal friends, Who continue to feed, love and provide for us.. however cruel we are. And to the "Friendly country folk" - enjoy your grog, "hard times in drought" (yet $50,000 land cruiser driving) lifestyles. I hope your animals never learn to speak and operate heavy machinery.