[capnhowdy]

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a young and very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch. She knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the paper for a ranch hand.

Two men applied for the job. One was gay, and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. One day, the widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however and he didn't return. Two o'clock, and no hired hand. He returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the house he found the ranchers widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her. "Unbutton my blouse, and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks."

He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. "Now, take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the firelight. "Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor. "Now," she said, "take off my panties." By the light of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off.

Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, I'll fire you on the spot."