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Sundae · 10-26-2005, 08:15 AM

I can't respond as a parent, so have racked my brains as a daughter. What is your primary objection to the age gap?

In my opinion the signififcant issues with a teenager/ older man scenario are sexual - the threat of STDs or the girl getting trapped in the relationship through pregnancy. If the young lady in question is careful about contraception I'd see it as a reasonably benign part of development.

When I was 16 I was dating a 25 year old. I thought everything he said was intelligent & profound and he was so much more interesting than boys my age. In hindsight he was hiding a great deal of insecurity and inexperience under a thin veneer of arrogance and worldliness.

The relationship ran its natural course and I grew out of wanting a partner to worship & looked for a partner to be an equal. Had my Mum known I think she would have interfered. And that would have made the man in question more attractive and for longer.

If there is an element of hero worship involved perhaps its best to stay out of it. And if its just down to normal attraction perhaps the advice still holds true...

10-26-2005, 08:15 AM	#5
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I can't respond as a parent, so have racked my brains as a daughter. What is your primary objection to the age gap? In my opinion the signififcant issues with a teenager/ older man scenario are sexual - the threat of STDs or the girl getting trapped in the relationship through pregnancy. If the young lady in question is careful about contraception I'd see it as a reasonably benign part of development. When I was 16 I was dating a 25 year old. I thought everything he said was intelligent & profound and he was so much more interesting than boys my age. In hindsight he was hiding a great deal of insecurity and inexperience under a thin veneer of arrogance and worldliness. The relationship ran its natural course and I grew out of wanting a partner to worship & looked for a partner to be an equal. Had my Mum known I think she would have interfered. And that would have made the man in question more attractive and for longer. If there is an element of hero worship involved perhaps its best to stay out of it. And if its just down to normal attraction perhaps the advice still holds true...