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vsp · 07-13-2001, 03:31 PM

Tony wrote:

>Note, I don't follow web cams... I found this on one of the many weblogs I peruse. And that log didn't point to the cam; it pointed to a page that had saved the shot, and contained a long rant against Stacy.

I visited www.cruel.com (Cruel Site of the Day) today, and whaddya know, the screen-capture-and-rant-against-Stacy page was today's selection.

The rant is indeed harsh, but largely accurate in and of itself.

The most telling bit, however, is not in the rant but on the cruel.com description of it. It provides a link to the LAST TIME she tried this.

Yes, that's right, she tried to off herself with pills (AND posted this little gem to her webcam message board: "oh my god...this is so wild...i can't believe i'm actually doing it! it's so scary but it's so easy too...and so pretty! all these little shapes!") in June of 2000, too.

What is this, Webcam Sweeps Week every summer?

This is sad, folks. There are two types of suicidal people -- those who go out and do it (and usually succeed, because they don't leave 173 clues as to how they'll do it and when and where), and those who tease those around them with endless threats and pleadings. Ever seen a little kid threaten to "be bad" if he doesn't get something he wants? This is the slightly-more-adult version of the same principle; give me what I want (love, attention, pampering, importance) or I'll do something you won't like.

I had a sort-of-ex-gf once who pulled stunts like that (the relationship never really even got started, but try and tell her that). She'd call just to let me know that she was all alone, sitting on her bed, juggling some knives around -- oops!, or she'd have that execrable Kix ballad about suicide playing loud in the background. This is not rational behavior -- these are emotional children. Emotional SMALL children.

So you have to treat these people like small children. They need help -- that is undeniable -- but they don't need reinforcement. A fan club full of sycophants ready to dial 911 at a moment's notice, burbling "We love you! Please don't leave us!" guarantees a repeat performance, because she got the reaction she wanted -- sympathy for whatever neuroses are guiding her. Hey, it's worked twice now!

Like a small child holding matches, you have to do two things: remove the immediate danger, then make it clear that the behavior is unacceptable. The first part (in grownup-land) includes a lot of therapy, and lord knows what else, but suffice it to say that after two stunts like this she needs some constant supervision. The second... well, it's time to take the webcam away and put it on top of the fridge until she's ready to grow up.

I'd quote Frank Zappa's "Suicide Chump" here but it would be superfluous.

jeff. the new millenium's version of standing on a window ledge, I suppose...

07-13-2001, 03:31 PM	#3
vsp Syndrome of a Down Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: West Chester Posts: 1,367	Kee-rist... Tony wrote: >Note, I don't follow web cams... I found this on one of the many weblogs I peruse. And that log didn't point to the cam; it pointed to a page that had saved the shot, and contained a long rant against Stacy. I visited www.cruel.com (Cruel Site of the Day) today, and whaddya know, the screen-capture-and-rant-against-Stacy page was today's selection. The rant is indeed harsh, but largely accurate in and of itself. The most telling bit, however, is not in the rant but on the cruel.com description of it. It provides a link to the LAST TIME she tried this. Yes, that's right, she tried to off herself with pills (AND posted this little gem to her webcam message board: "oh my god...this is so wild...i can't believe i'm actually doing it! it's so scary but it's so easy too...and so pretty! all these little shapes!") in June of 2000, too. What is this, Webcam Sweeps Week every summer? This is sad, folks. There are two types of suicidal people -- those who go out and do it (and usually succeed, because they don't leave 173 clues as to how they'll do it and when and where), and those who tease those around them with endless threats and pleadings. Ever seen a little kid threaten to "be bad" if he doesn't get something he wants? This is the slightly-more-adult version of the same principle; give me what I want (love, attention, pampering, importance) or I'll do something you won't like. I had a sort-of-ex-gf once who pulled stunts like that (the relationship never really even got started, but try and tell her that). She'd call just to let me know that she was all alone, sitting on her bed, juggling some knives around -- oops!, or she'd have that execrable Kix ballad about suicide playing loud in the background. This is not rational behavior -- these are emotional children. Emotional SMALL children. So you have to treat these people like small children. They need help -- that is undeniable -- but they don't need reinforcement. A fan club full of sycophants ready to dial 911 at a moment's notice, burbling "We love you! Please don't leave us!" guarantees a repeat performance, because she got the reaction she wanted -- sympathy for whatever neuroses are guiding her. Hey, it's worked twice now! Like a small child holding matches, you have to do two things: remove the immediate danger, then make it clear that the behavior is unacceptable. The first part (in grownup-land) includes a lot of therapy, and lord knows what else, but suffice it to say that after two stunts like this she needs some constant supervision. The second... well, it's time to take the webcam away and put it on top of the fridge until she's ready to grow up. I'd quote Frank Zappa's "Suicide Chump" here but it would be superfluous. jeff. the new millenium's version of standing on a window ledge, I suppose...