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Old 08-11-2006, 05:50 PM   #1035
Boss Hogg
Complex Simpleton
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 18
A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf
> course, became confused as to where he was on the course.
> Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked
> up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew
> what hole he was playing. She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole
> and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.
> He thanked her and went back to his golf.
>
> On the back nine the same thing happened,
> and he approached her again with the same request.
> She said, "I'm on the 14th hole, you are a holebehind me,
> so you must be on the 13th hole."
> Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.
>
> He finished his round and went to the clubhouse where he saw
> the same lady sitting at the end of the bar.
> He asked the bartender if he knew the lady.
> The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.
>
> Approaching her he politely said, "Allow me to buy you a drink in
> appreciation for your help. I understand that you are in the
> sales profession. I'm in sales also. What do you sell?"
> She replied, "If I tell you, you'll laugh.
> "No, I won't." He said.
> "Well, if you must know," she said, "I work for Tampax."
>
> With that, he laughed so hard he almost fell off his barstool.
> "See" she said, "I told you, you would laugh."
>
> "No, no, no!" That's not what I'm laughing at." he replied.
> "I'm a salesman for Preparation H, so I'm still a hole behind you!

:
__________________
"Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in your first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker."

"You play for a living, it's like any other job. You don't gamble, you grind it out. Your goal is to win one big bet an hour. That's it. Get your money in when you have the best of it, protect it when you don't. Don't give anything away."

Matt Damon as Mike McDermott in

R O U N D E R S
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