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I believe that it is a matter of choice. Very few elements of human behavior are truly hardwired. It's not like animal behavior, such as a cat grooming itself with it's tongue, or chasing mice. Cats do these things even if they haven't had significant contact with other cats throughout their lives.
I have heard a theory put forth (not saying I agree with it, just reporting what I've heard) that sexual orientation is often a matter of the first significant sexual contact that a person has.
Sexual behavior often involves what's called "one trial learning" in psychology.
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