[Sundae]

Without wanting to agree with a thread that presents my least favourite world view (things are worse than they've ever been, woe for the good old days, we're going to hell in a handbasket) I do agree that there appears to be a trend towards lack of personal responsibility.

I wonder if part of it is the burden of choice placed on very young children. My generation were told what to do. Even where there was potential choice it was limited. We had limited children's television programmes on 2 channels, no choice in school dinners (not even the choice not to eat them - we were sent back to the table if our plates were too full), our parents chose where we went to school, where we went on holiday (if at all).

It meant that when we got to make decisions for ourselves at 16+ it was a scary experience. We felt the weight of the responsibility and unconsciously tried to reflect our parents' choices. When we did ridiculous, dangerous, even criminal things we knew we were doing something they wouldn't approve of and we knew we deserved to get into trouble - we just kept our fingers crossed and laughed nervously when we got away with it.

Now children are bombarded with choice.

Just as a small example, when I worked in the supermarket I often saw mothers saying to children barely old enough to talk, "Do you want that one? Or the other one? Do you want yoghurt or Froobs? Did you like that when we had it last week?" I remember watching a father letting his daughter choose her clothes - she couldn't have been more than 3. He was trying to tell her she could have the trousers or the dress but she kept tugging on both. She got both.

Children now seem to grow up believing their choices are important, that they are the ones in control of their lives. This is fiction, they are safe because their parents keep them safe. They believe they are capable of making complex decisions at a younger and younger age, but in fact they still need guidance.

So often on forums or tv or overheard conversations I hear teens stubbornly refusing advice in the belief that they know what they want and that's the most important thing. Forget what other people say, especially older people, they will follow their gut instinct because they know it's right.

Sigh.

Apologies for sweeping statements.