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Please don't kill yourself. If you knew the train wreck this makes of the lives of your siblings, parents, lovers, ex-lovers, workmates, ex-workmates and everyone whe cares about you (and they do, whatever you think) I hope that you would see that your life has value. And perhaps that would encourage you to seek help in finding that value again for yourself.
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Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of 
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