[BigV]

hey, rk. here's a proposed plan for you. I read that the fetus this and full custody that and none of this after the fact blah blah blah...

So. You find a man that feels this way? That he wants full custody of the child he fathers? No problemo. Get the agreement between the parties, man and woman, **before** the fact. Now, you've a leg to stand on. Now each person is making an informed decision. Informed consent. Discuss, agree, sign, sex, pregnancy, birth, custody.

--aside-- Talk about a mood killer.. yeesh.

But now there will be no surprises, no mistaken assumptions. He and she knew the job was dangerous when they took it.

I agree this is not foolproof. People change their minds. Happens all the time in all kinds of situations, even those as important and emotionally supercharged as this one. And still, people work it out. Build into the contract the "escape clauses" and the penalties for breaking the contract. Then you have a law that can be objectively evaluated. You have a structure that can be anticipated and navigated. Reform and refine as you go.

I daresay a man that protects his interests in this way, while effective, will ever have any interests to actually protect. What woman would sign? And a woman that would sign (and a man that would sign) would likely be bound by the unwritten social contract that is in effect every day.

But trying to enforce something like this **after** it has begun... not gonna happen. No contracts, no agreements of any kind get made when you mix up cooperation and compulsion.

Consent and coercion are mutually exclusive. One cannot be transformed into the other.