Quote:
Originally Posted by DanaC
kgg this isn't about condemning her. This is about ensuring that if what she is doing is being done as part of the 'divorce game' then deuce protects himself.
I couldn't give a shit abotu her, because I don't know her and she's never posted here. Doesn't mean I think she's in the wrong, she might be in the right. Not the point: Deuce is here, he's a dwellar, we want him to be okay. The advice here in this thread is offered in that spirit.
Also...the woman has taken out court orders against him. She has prevented him from seeing his children. It does not really matter whether her reasons were valid/understandable to us or not. Right now, anger is deuce's friend. She is not.
Smurf, I see your point, and indeed I have asked the same question. Ultimately though, it doesn't really matter. What matters is that Deuce and his (ex) wife get to the end of this process with as little trauma as possible. What matters is that at the end of this process there will be a degree of peace and stability in which to reflect on it.
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I thank you for your concern for me, truly I do. I would hope that you care for the things I care about too, which means a certain amount of compassion and respect for my wife. **I** give a shit about her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rkzenrage
Who said anything about a son not having a father? In fact I was the one trying to tell you how to make sure you don't slip-up in that area.
Be paranoid about everything else but the person who is trying to actually do what you are worried about... don't listen to me at all, this will be my last post.
I have been around this kind of stuff my whole life and know how these restraining orders work and know that people will create openings for others to walk through them on their own so they will have that on their side in court or deliberations later.
If she is playing this to win and you are just trying to get to talk to her and spend every second with your son every day that you can and she knows this, you are fucked. Have fun, because you are not in this for the long haul.
A divorce is not about feelings it is about assets and privileges and who "deserves" them and there are no rules as to how the perception of that is obtained and it seems to me that you are completely unaware as to what is happening here.
I gave you advice based on experience, those orders are nothing to play with, every word you say can be turned and used against you....
But you chose to try to make it seem like I was your enemy by trying to show you that.
Forget it man, forget you.
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Man, I think you're full of it. Divorce is not about feelings? Right, that's why Costco carries them in a handy twelve pack. Are you cracked? Are you a Vulcan? I previously excused you from answering for precisely this reason. Your money's no good on my planet. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and permit myself to think you were acting with good intentions. Good or not, your delivery sucks and I'm done with you too. Buhbye.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cicero
I think Smurf and I know from experience here. Professional and otherwise. Please, please listen Deuce.
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Perhaps you two do, I damn sure don't. I'm trying my hardest to do what needs to be done, to do the right thing, to achieve the greatest good while causing the least harm. It's not easy in the best of circumstances, and I appreciate the different perspectives here, the opportunity to share the wisdom gained from other's experiences. But, I must filter all that input into what works for my situation. rkzenrage's for example, not working for me. Thankfully, others here have offered insights that I can apply.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cicero
I'm sorry Deuce...your world turned into a paranoid thriller when your own wife said that you were a threat to her and your family. It's called reality...paranoid...yes...but also your new reality.
Either way- she shouldn't be talking to you. I don't know what you did. But she has got to stop- this can get you in deep doo-doo.
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I know. It scares the shit out of me. But I'm not able to just walk away. I can't. I don't know how to explain that more betterer. Not talking is how we got into this fuckin mess. Somebody's got to talk to get us to any conclusion. Lord knows I'm motivated and, as you can plainly see, I'm a talker.