[Cicero]

He is not allowed to see her whether she allowed it or not. Don't you guys get that? The State is not allowing it for both parties. The State enforces these orders for a reason. It is as black and white as it sounds. She is violating her own restraining order and can get in trouble with the state as well. He needs proof that she has violated the restraining order so when she uses his contact as a negotiating point he has some self-protection. He needs to tell his attorney about her contact.

They do hand out restrainig orders willy-nilly. I've seen it. I saw a report that said the guy was "escalating" during an arguement. Yes escalating can get you a restraining order. He just found out that she had been having an affair for quite some time. I would "escalate" too. The report was empty outside of escalating. I'm escalating right now.

My point is....either you are a threat or you're not. You can't have it both ways because the state is in charge of the restraining order. Not you or your wife. Ask your attorney. You both are in violation. Now you both can get in trouble. If she is caught- the first thing she is going to do is blame it on you.

Follow the advice of your attorney.

Just follow his/her advice for now and you guys can hash things out later. You are at great risk.

I have tons of compassion for your situation, but be patient and live out the order or you could possibly see the inside of a cell and not get to see or talk to anybody except for your bunk-mate.