|
I prefer the original, althought it's not as formulaic. But I agree with Flint. Making unsolicited suggestions for "improvement" on spontaneous poetry is bad form/manners. IMO of course.
Oh OK then here it is as a spontaneous Haiku
Rushing stream bumps rocks
A shining twisted ribbon.
Don't build a canal.
__________________
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart
|