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There are all sorts of table manners out there that have no logical explanation behind them but that have become accepted as "correct." In my opinion, the only reason to follow those particular manners would be to conform to what is considered "correct." Often in this life, conforming is very helpful, and the kids will be glad to know proper manners when they are older.
My wife and I have disagreements sometimes on how much to expect from our children when it comes to table manners. I generally agree with her that the kids should know what good table manners are, and the best way to do that is to practice them at home. But I also believe that one should be comfortable, and putting elbows on the table is a pretty minor thing.
I do things like put my elbows on the table. I also ignore the American custom of switching the fork and knife back and forth from hand to hand when cutting meat and putting the pieces in my mouth. I know it's "wrong" but don't care, because it's stupid. She wishes I would be a perfect example of manners in front of the kids.
Mostly I focus on things like making sure the kids sit on their bottoms and stay in their seats. Don't talk with full mouths. Don't over-reach for stuff. Etc. Although to be honest, I'm not always consistent with enforcing that.
Manners often have a purpose, but are sometimes just stupid and arbitrary.
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