[ZenGum]

This from Douglas Adams

The room was not a room to elevate the soul. Louis XIV, to pick a
name at random, would not have liked it, would have found it not sunny
enough, and insufficiently full of mirrors. He would have desired
someone to pick up the socks, put the records away, and maybe burn the
place down. Michelangelo would have been distressed by its proportions,
which were neither lofty nor shaped by any noticeable inner harmony or
symmetry, other than that all parts of the room were pretty much
equally full of old coffee mugs, shoes and brimming ashtrays, most of
which were now sharing their tasks with each other. The walls were
painted in almost precisely that shade of green which Raffaello Sanzio
would have bitten off his own right hand at the wrist rather than use,
and Hercules, on seeing the room, would probably have returned half an
hour later armed with a navigable river. It was, in short, a dump, and
was likely to remain so for as long as it remained in the custody of Mr
Svlad, or 'Dirk', Gently, né Cjelli.