Okay, I'd like to see
this written into an Austen novel:
Quote:
Sex toys spring up in suburban street
RESIDENTS in the rural area of Darwin have renamed their street "Dildo Boulevard" after 30 sex toys were found lying in front of a house on Friday morning.
Robert Johns and Laurelle Bates discovered the mysterious toys as they left for work in the morning.
"It's a real mystery. We have no idea where they came from," Ms Bates said.
"I know they aren't new. They look used."
Mr Johns said he counted the sex toys on Friday morning, and the number had decreased within 24 hours.
"Yeah, some of the bigger ones are gone," he said.
Many of the devices are still lying outside the Osbeck Rd home - most crushed under the wheels of passing cars.
Locals have been puzzled by their sudden appearance and are trying to solve the curious case of the invading sex toys.
One theory is that it is an elaborate - and expensive - practical joke. Another school of thought is that they fell off the back of a delivery truck.
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"I say, Mr Darcy, whatever is that?"
"Sadly, I know not, Miss Bennett, I have never seen the like before."
"To what use do you imagine it might be put, then, Mr Darcy?"