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DanaC · 04-19-2009, 06:22 AM

Bri, that totally sucks. If you'll forgive me, I think your ex sounds like he deserves a cockney cock punch.

Don't let his view of you impact on your view of you. One of the delightful things about divorce is it ends your obligation to give a flying fuck what he does or doesn't respect, or understand about you. Yes, it's upsetting that anybody would think that of you. And it's a kick in the face, to be cut out of decisions about your child. You don't deserve that. He IS treating you unfairly. And he probably isn't helping your son's attitude towards you into the bargain. That's unfair and wrong imo. But what he thinks of you? The fact that he holds that view of you? Well, what the fuck you gonna do. It's his head, he's entitled to fill it with as much errant nonsense as he chooses. But you don't have to believe his nonsense. And you don't have to respect it. Cope with, deal with, the effect that view has in practical terms (as in this case with the trip to casualty), but discount it utterly in emotional terms. It's his bullshit. Not yours.

04-19-2009, 06:22 AM	#3723
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Bri, that totally sucks. If you'll forgive me, I think your ex sounds like he deserves a cockney cock punch. Don't let his view of you impact on your view of you. One of the delightful things about divorce is it ends your obligation to give a flying fuck what he does or doesn't respect, or understand about you. Yes, it's upsetting that anybody would think that of you. And it's a kick in the face, to be cut out of decisions about your child. You don't deserve that. He IS treating you unfairly. And he probably isn't helping your son's attitude towards you into the bargain. That's unfair and wrong imo. But what he thinks of you? The fact that he holds that view of you? Well, what the fuck you gonna do. It's his head, he's entitled to fill it with as much errant nonsense as he chooses. But you don't have to believe his nonsense. And you don't have to respect it. Cope with, deal with, the effect that view has in practical terms (as in this case with the trip to casualty), but discount it utterly in emotional terms. It's his bullshit. Not yours.