[Whit]

      Thanks Onyx and Dani. The suggestion then, is that my experience has been with people that didn't get to cope like that completely then. they got cut off and are having to deal slowly. That makes sense.
      If I can ask another, if you can't use this method Onyx said she was " resolving things little teeny bit by bit" any suggestions as to how someone might do this? I mean if they seem to be locked up, how do you get the ball rolling?
      I really appreciate any help. I've never understood what the hell was going on with these people. Any help you can give me will hopefully help them. Thanks again.