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well, I guess, in fairness, I didn't really specify much when I said "rough patch". Maybe that'll color things a bit? Maybe it'll give some fodder to tell me I'm blind.
Couple months into the relationship: Some offhand word's got her convinced I'm looking to part ways. I admit to her that I'd been thinking more about a lifetime together. She tells me I should wait at least until the one year mark. Ok, then.
One year mark comes around. She gets a bit tossed during our anniversary date. I take her home and go back to my place. Next morning she shows up early freaked out about how I'm taking that.
A month or so later I figure I'd been asking lots of people about marriage, but not talking much with her about it, and it dawns on me that it'd effect her more than anyone else, so we have a serious conversation.
January hits and she hits me with the "let's be chaste"
March comes along, we go out to dinner for her friend's birthday. Some guy is hitting on her. I'm uncomfortable, but amongst all her friends, decide that she can stand up for herself and I'll not be the loudmouthed jerk. On the drive home, she indicates I chose wrong. Day later, we're talking and I ask if it bugged her so much, why did she keep talking to the guy? Argument.
Don't talk much for the rest of the week. Meet up that weekend, talk some things out. Marriage is mentioned again in passing.
Things get better, for a time.
Stupid arguments start becoming more frequent. She doesn't come over to my place anymore, citing the chastity thing and "temptation"
Serious conversations happening all the time now. She finally tells me that she doesn't want to go on the weekend away that we'd been planning as "THE WEEKEND", says it was like we'd broken up a few weeks ago and were just dealing with the aftermath. I tell her "What if we take the pressure off the table and just have a nice weekend away?"
Suddenly things are like the best of times again. I get stupid. I'm on the phone with my friends every day trying to figure out what to do. All pieces of advice sound good. Freak out thinking that I should just go through with it and stop whining so much.
And here we are.
That'll probably reinforce some opinions that it's time to move on. It's just hard for me to see that right now. Maybe I missed something. Maybe it's some dumb test to see if I can give her her space. I just don't know.
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