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I was a full time caretaker for my mother and dad until they both passed away so maybe I can give you some insight. First, some background on my situation as all are different.
My parents lived about 800 miles away from me (my home is in Houston, Texas) in Atlanta, GA and had wanted to live out their lives in their home of 40 years. My mother had Alzheimer's disease in a state of slow progression and my father had been her caretaker for a few years as she lost the ability to do things like cooking or housework or drive a car. I was making monthly trips to see them when my father began to loose his eyesight. At that point my sister, who was single moved in with them to do their errand running, get them to doctors and church and such. Then my mother fell and broke a hip. She got a replacement and was able to learn to walk again but about a year later fell and broke the other one. At this point they did the surgery but she could not learn to walk again and my father's eyesight was all but gone. While my mother was in recovery she came down with several deadly nursing home type infections and we did not expect her to live much longer. When the infections were gone we took her home and got hospice care as she was very weak. But it was more then my sister could handle since my dad was now 99% blind so after discussing it with my wife (who traveled a great deal for work) I moved back to their home to be one of their caretakers. Thanks to our good care and my mother's strong stamina, she survived under hospice care for 2 more years which is pretty unusual. While hospice supplied a nurse aide 3 times a week to bathe her and help out (and a nurse visit once a week), my sister and I were the full-time care givers. Our days started early and ended late and you could be awakened at any time of night with an emergency and we worked 7 days a week. Once every other month or so one of us would get a break, a week or 2 off while the other caregiver ran solo.
When my mother died, it was hard on my dad and he began to go downhill. They had been married for 62 years so he took her death pretty hard. Seven months after she died, he had a major stroke and after a week of hospice care in their home he passed away; he was 92.
So what can I tell you? Don't feel guilty and don't try to do it alone. Having some kind of support is so important. For me it was the support of my wife and some good friends, my kids and others. I even started seeing a therapist and had to take anti-depressants for 2 years. At times I was angry and depressed and even considered my own future as I did not want to end up like this. I can not stress this enough and just the fact that you have asked for help here is a good sign; I made many good friends here while care taking for my parents.
Get plenty of exercise and eat well. Sounds a bit simple but when we care for others we tend to put our needs last and you will need all the strength you can get.
Make decisions as best you can as things transpire. But you may need to start thinking about how much is too much for you to handle. My mother lost the ability to control her bowels and I had to give her suppositories and then clean up everything, just like taking care of a baby. I dressed and undressed her and fed her as she could not do any of this on her own. I had to do things we take for granted like how to wash her hair. I used to wheel her out on the deck by their kitchen in all but the coldest weather and recline the back of her wheel chair and wash her hair with a bucket of warm water, then wheel her back into the kitchen and comb and dry it with a blow dryer. I also had to have her clothes altered so the sleeves and side from the cuff to the hip on each side were cut and fixed with velcro. She could not bend her arms enough to be dressed so I came up with this method. The Hospice team was very impressed!
Are your parents able to maintain their lives on whatever income they have? My parents were, thanks to a life of work they both got good SS payments and also my dad had investments. But in the end, it may have been cheaper for them to have been in a good assisted living home. You and they will have to weigh all of the pros and cons of how their future is to be planned out and keep in mind that things seldom go exactly as you want.
Don't know what else I can say, but I'll keep watching this thread and you can PM me if you want to get in touch in a less public manner for more help or support.
Best of luck and don't ever feel guilt. Everything you are doing now is a sign of your love and devotion to them.
As a side note, I took many pictures of my parents as I documented the final days of their lives. This was a good thing for me, mentally. Here is one of my favorite ones I call, "My Mother's Hands" She used to play the piano and had beautiful hands.
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