Over the space of a couple of days I received Emails allegedly from Tom Ridge who, for some reason, apparently works from an office in London, Ban Ki Moon and the Rt Hon Gordon Brown MP, Prime Minister of this Parish. The sums involved rose on receipt of each communication. I'm expecting a cheque from Gordon Brown for £1.5 trillion any day now.
I'm sure Mr Ridge won't mind me copying you all into our correspondence............
Quote:
Homeland Security London England
From Secretary of Homeland Security: Mr. Tom Ridge
Attention
We are glad to inform you today that a New Payment Policy has been adopted for 2010 by the Homeland Security London England and you are short listed for a compensation payment benefit sum of Ј300,000.00 British Pounds Sterling under the funding assistance by the Government of England.
This might interest you to know that the Homeland Security Intelligent Unit (HSIU) in connection with the men of the Metropolitan Police Service (MPS) conducted series of probing and investigation process in all the internet saver providers in England and your E-mail address was recovered among the Spam violated list by some unlawful and uncivilised British who are incapable of creating any decent job to earn an honest living, rather the chose to abuse the use of internet. We are in no doubt believed that these internet imposters /fraud stars from British must have collected money from you through their criminal and evil ways.
It was on these recommendations that the Government of England instructed the Homeland Security Intelligent Unit to settle and compensate all the foreign victims whose email address was short listed in order to restore British to the enviable standard of respectability and dignity within the community of nations.
Please kindly contact the PAYMENT PROCESSING OFFICER with your full names, address and telephone numbers on the below information for immediate processing of your settlement/compensation payment benefit to you.
Contact Person: SIR MARK SMITH
E-mail: [email address]
Your allocation code no is; BTG/00135 (Please use as subject)
There is nothing to be worried about again as we are fully supervising the whole payment process to avoid any uncalled for or delay of payment by any body.
Congratulations from the Homeland Security Intelligent Unit.
Yours in service,
Mr. Tom Ridge.
Secretary of Homeland Security
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My emphasis, by the way.
Carruthers