I knew you guys would have plenty of supremely inventive answers!
For practicality I'm favouring the low-tech, cheesecloth bag approach myself. I'm trying to use fewer utensils, DanaC, glatt and piercehaweye45, I'm afraid, and anyway, I already cook consistently good rice with arould 30 seconds of preparation

.
I've tried Zip's method, but frequently it just isn't worth the hassle. Likewise Pete, sometimes eating white rice is easier than persuading, y'know? And Jim - Quinoa?!?! The very name is wierd, I'll eat it, but I fear it's more persuasion for Mr L!!
Probably my favourite
idea is ZenGum's, but arranging them on the plate? Can't we train them to lie down the right way up??
Gouging his eyes out would also probably create more problems than it would solve ...
Thank you all so much for helping me to see this in a different (brown?) light!