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Event 1: Trollathlon
Flaming - Hi there, don't you find me just bedazzling?
Speed banning - Concurrent use of Ban & Lady Speed Stick
Terrible poetry - Rose was fickle, Martha was wrong, Donna was Noble, and Amy had Song
Incomprehensible Philosophy - I masturbate; therefore, I am.
Spam Linking - slicing or dicing
Event 2: Marathon
Longest time between posts - or gas stations
Event 3: Target Shooting - Kmart Shooting, Wal-Mart Shooting
Event 4: Aquatics
Shark/Dolphin identification - Tuna net trivia
Event 5: Track
On a treadmill - In the windmills of your mind
Event 6: Fencing
How much will StaceyV need? - Not as much as BigV?
Event 7: Lolling Triathlon
Cats - Nine lives
Inanimate objects - Still lives
Political figures - Almost lifelike
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