Wow UT, sorry this is your shit to deal with now. I hope you are able to make the best of it. Concentrating on just you could be a really good thing for you.
The drinking thing...it gets me upset now and then too. He knows it because I voice it - I dont like him drunkish, and he gets there starting at the fourth beer. But, I have never givien it a second thought that it would make me leave him, because all in all, he does try to control it.
If however his boys dont get their acts together, I may go live with my Mom for a while...
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