Quote:
Originally Posted by Undertoad
But you know, when a relationship is new, it's good sometimes, because your not-together shit works together in some way.
but goddammit this woman gained 100 pounds during our time together and i was nothing but supportive about whatever decisions she made about it. somehow she still got mad at me and needed me to change. i don't know what a relationship is any more. it's not showing love. whatever that is.
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When someone 'needs you to change', they aren't loving YOU - they just have an image of their ideal partner in mind. Not talking about someone encouraging you to stretch, reach for what YOU really want for yourself - just about the myriad tormentors who try to fit their partners into a Procrustean bed that fits their fantasy.
Sorry you got burned showing love. It's never wrong to do; but it can backfire when offered to the wrong person. Sorry.