Quote:
The theorem here and among other Dwellars seems to be that Ibby must
know of, understand, show empathy for, and listen to, her elders
before she will be able to effectively discuss her issues.
She should be tolerant of those who do not tolerate her... etc.
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No, I don't think that's what anyone is saying, and it's definitely not what I think.
What I DO think is that like most people her age, Ibs is totally absorbed in her own world and own journey, and as I say to my own kids (who are only a few/couple of years younger and tend to have the same mind set at times) that's fine. Get back to me in a few years and let me know if you still feel the same way.
The point is, I make my suggestions, and if they're falling on deaf ears, I am forced to acknowledge that whatever the issue is that we're discussing, I'm forced to let them find their own path because they aren't interested in what 'an old fart like me' has to say about it, cause what would I know?
I recall being similar to that when I was younger. There are many things my parents tried to advise me on during my youth which I refused to accept advice on which I now wish I had, but that's part of growing up. Coming to realise that sometimes the old farts did and still do know what they're talking about. It's where the saying, 'the more you know, the more you find you don't know' comes from.
Kids don't know enough yet to realise how much they don't know. That's ok. That's just the way it is.
eta: Please note that I have made only one comment about thinking that Ib and Merc were both guilty of saying bad stuff to each other. With regard to whatever else Ibs has said in this thread, I have tried to explain it from my own personal perspective. I understand that Ibs needs to do things a certain way and that's fine, but I find now, that i have little or no response to those posts simply because I do feel I have some experience in some of these issues, so I don't need to be told how I 'should' feel about them. Ibs could post about them till the cows come home, and if that makes her feel good, then that's ok by me, but as I mentioned earlier in this thread, I really don't see any benefit in being part of the discussion because I have nothing positive to add. I've said the things I felt might have been helpful and now there is not much more I could say, so why keep talking? I'm pretty sure this is how many others here feel too. They're not saying Ibs shouldn't be saying these things. They're simply saying they have nothing helpful to add.