[IamSam]

OK, it has taken forever, but I'm told that I will finally get my extended unemployment beginning next week. I had to jump through several hoops to do this, and one was an aptitude test, created by someone in a Federal office somewhere who had too much time on their hands, or - at the very least - needs to get a life.

The last time I took an aptitude test I was 17 and my ideal job turned out to be "light house keeper." Unfortunately, Colorado had no lighthouses then and STILL hasn't. What could I do other than to go live in a cardboard box? But apt tests are no longer the same these days. This time, I came out as "Artist," but that doesn't mean I should go paint pix or whatever. It's more like being a "rabbit" or a "tiger" when you look up your animal on one of those Chinese astrology mats while you're waiting for you sweet and sour mystery meat to arrive.

An "Artist" (you can also score "Scientist" or "Social," etc.) has a good imagination and often comes up with solutions on her own that are" far better than those of the boss." (I added the last part). "Artists" are best left alone to accomplish their work-related tasks because a thwarted "Artist" can turn into a mass murderer at the blink of an eye. Gee, I wonder what occupation might be best for an "Artist"? Could it be keeping a light house, perhaps?

Stuff like the above surely has been a contributing factor for the way County unemployment has increased for every consecutive month over the past 5 years.

After a couple of hours of this sort of crap, I finally escaped from the "Work Force Center" and got down to the business of looking for a job. Motel and hotel managers have started looking anxiously down the road in hopes of seeing an advancing phalanx of tourists and jobs are starting to open up some - just don't tell them you're an "Artist."

I started at one end of Main Street and then worked my way down the other, leaving off resumes for a career in the hospitality industry - the main type of work available here except for the casinos run by the tribes, and Native Americans have hiring preferences in those.

I emphasized to potential employers that I was looking for a night auditor job, not so much a front desk clerk (although I'd gladly do that, too). Night auditors don't have to look cute and young since they usually come out like vampires after 8pm or so and may stay as late as 2am, tucked out of sight in the far back, trying to get the damn books to balance just this once.

A couple of managers were pretty encouraging, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Hiring will commence in April. We'll see...