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I can only speak from my experience. If I have ever been interested in a guy or demonstrated caring, my 'warmth' and 'caring - it defines you' - were clearly a joke and I was humiliated. The only times I've been treated well, or pursued, were when I either had resolved not to see someone again or had resolved to depart.
Running hot and cold could be an explanation. I'll think about it.
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The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. - Ghandi 
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