[Happy Monkey]

Not the worst parent in the world. Not the worst. There are plenty of worse parents.

But WTF?

"Please can I have a blue bike for Cwiss-mass?"

I'm ashamed to admit it, but her certainty brought out layers of uncertainty for me.

I didn't mind that Gracie didn't want a pink bike or a sparkly bike or one with princesses painted on the sides. Since day one, Shawn and I have tried to find a good balance that would allow Gracie to be as girlie, or not girlie, as she wanted, despite the gender stereotypes that seem to bombard children at every turn.

Her bedroom is a cheery mix of greens, blues, purples, yellows and, yes, pinks. She's never watched a princess movie or TV show but has a couple fairy tale books and dress-up tutus for when she wants to play pretend.

And I always take great care to pay her compliments that celebrate her intellect, decision-making skills and sense of humor, not just her cute looks or pretty dress.

But a blue bike? Really? The blue bikes I saw in a quick online search featured Power Rangers, pirates and Spider-Man, with boys depicted riding them.
I wondered if perhaps we'd gone too far in trying to keep Gracie away from princess-mania. I worried that soon she'll be made fun of on the playground for being a tomboy. And I questioned whether I was failing as a mother for not raising her to be dainty enough.

At the same time I also kicked myself for not just embracing my daughter's conviction. Wasn't this what we'd been striving for with all our gender-neutralizing efforts? My favorite color is blue, so why can't my little girl have the same preference? Was I a mommy hypocrite?

"You know, I think Santa's elves are more used to making red bikes," I attempted, desperate for a quick fix. "Are you sure you don't want a red bike?"

"Santa's elves make me a blue bike," Gracie shot back.

That's when I knew I needed professional help.

Diane Levin, a professor of early childhood education at Wheelock College in Boston, was not surprised to hear my dilemma.

I think Diane Levin was just too professional to express her surprise.