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I think someone in the D thread pointed out something that was really true about it. You lived with her for so long and so closely bonded that she became a part of you. Your emotions were intertwined, your decisions were made jointly, etc. so when you imagine her with another guy, it's like it's incomprehensible.
But eventually you will think of her as her and you as you.
It helped me to see that the first decision my ex made on her own was obviously a terrible decision - pathetically wrong in almost every way.
There's one for the "would you rather" thread. I got full disclosure of what was going on in her life. I got full disclosure that when she went on vacation on her own, she hooked up with one of the staffers and had hot monkey sex for days in a row. I knew the guy's name and their plans together. I knew when they broke up. I know when she dated again and what happened on the first few dates. She told me everything.
Well, many people get NO information at all. What would you rather? I'm pretty sure that I prefer it my way. It's dramatic, it makes a good story, and it helps to see and understand what happened and even to get over it all.
Then again, I have never ever been the jealous sort.
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