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Old 10-27-2007, 07:42 AM   #804
DanaC
We have to go back, Kate!
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,669
*sighs* The two Js have fallen out. Had a screaming row and are both now upset. He's been prickly as an old army blanket just lately and picking fights with everyone. I can see him sabotaging good friendships and a good relationship and it really upsets me. I know him better than anybody else, but that means I also know it's pointless trying to get him to see what he's doing. He is absolutely adamant that the aggression, or hostility, or lack of respect etc comes from them first. Any attempt to calm him down and get him to see that his good friend hasn't just started raising their voice at him out the blue for no reason, just makes him feel that you are taking their side, and are just not seeing what he's had to put up with. Cannot see his part in provoking those reactions in people, goes off feeling like the whole world's against him, and that now even his friends don't like him...*heavy sigh* which is of course not true.

Had a text convo with her and haven't spoken to him yet. She clearly understands where he's coming from, but that doesn't make it any easier at the time the row erupts. Having lived with him for 12 years I know the patterns of those rows. She tells me her side of it it's like hearing myself talking to mum back in my 20s. Want to hug her. Want to hug and slap him.
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