[OnyxCougar]

When I was 16, I got pregnant. I had the child and gave him up for adoption to my (then) husband's aunt and uncle. I got pregnant again at 18 and went to Vegas for an abortion. (The first husband was very abusive and is now in prison for murder.)

After I was divorced from first husband, I became engaged and ended up getting pregnant again. His mother convinced us now was not the time for a baby, since we were in school and he still lived with her. I had another abortion and there were complications. It was not fun.

Years later, I had an option to go get my son back, and I did so. (Full story in the "Seriousness that changed you" thread in Philosophy.)

So I've been the abortion route, AND I've been the adoption route.

IMO, the adoption route is MUCH harder. I wondered every day how he was doing, what he looked like, what games did he enjoy, I mean, everything an absent parent thinks.

I do have some guilt over the two babies I killed (and I have no illusions that is exactly what I did) but I've learned what Bruce points out - Look Forward, not behind. My guilt about what I did then is now one of my life's lessons.

I tell my children that every action has a consequence, and every choice is your own to make.

I think that abortion SHOULD be a choice, open to all women.

IMO, that little thing *is* a baby. From Conception. Couch it in whatever terms you want, but the fact is, if not killed, a baby comes out. You don't say "I had a fetus today!" or "We're going to have a parasite!" or in the western movies, "She's with zygote!"

MY morals should have nothing to do with anyone else's morals. I don't have to like what another woman is doing, I can only state my opinion and tell my life experiences. But it's still that woman's choice to kill that baby, give it up for adoption, or keep it.