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I come back over a year later to say to Monster - ha!
That's not a bruise!
Last Tuesday (ie a week and a half ago) we had a pirate party at school.
Instead of What's the Time Mr Wolf?, we played What's the Time Mr Shark?. Out on the school field, divoted and pock-marked as it is. Now I'm an enthusiastic volunteer, and was an extremely active child/ teen. I forget I am morbidly obese and if I run full pelt to catch the children I also run the risk of coming down with all the weight of responsibility behind me.
As happened. I tripped, and came down on one knee and shin and the other shoulder. Luckily I didn't reach terminal velocity, and was wearing jogging bottoms for the precise reason that I knew it would be an active day.
The best of the bruising didn't really come up for the best part of a week.
It's still painful to kneel on my left knee - something I realised today when Diz (the cheeky shit) nipped into the 'rents' room for a kip under their bed. He's not allowed in there full-stop, because he's such a bully. The fact he had to be dragged out by his scruff, with me moaning OW OW OW suggests he was planning a pointy surprise for Mia sometime tonight.
So enough talk, here we are. Included both legs to emphasise the colouring. I'm pretty pale - this is not a healthy tan. Oh and yes - I am hairy. I have no desire to touch the swollen and bruised leg, even with a razor, if I can cover it up in the mean time. Luckily my invite to the Large Women's MiniSkirt Ball has not yet arrived.
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