[lumberjim]

While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit),
a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the
other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car,and
with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's
your hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a
rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to
two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from
side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely
stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
To which she politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him
behind a bridge........"

Traffic Ticket: $95.00
Court Costs: $45.00
The Look on that Cop's Face: PRICELESS