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Being kind doesn't always mean being permissive. At some point you have to wonder whether it is logically possible to send a message about tolerable behavior by tolerating intolerable behavior. Really doesn't make sense when you think of it that way. So the question is: how do you deal with a broken person who says they want help? I believe that step number one--and this is a deal breaker--is being able to believe that they are receptive to real help. That means a number of things: hard work, honesty, and dropping one's conceits. This work must be done by the recipient, and there is not one single thing a "helper" can do with someone who isn't willing to put themselves in this position. You can't help someone who already believes that they have all the answers (meaning--all the answers are kept in one magic book that is never wrong).
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There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there
it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your
expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever
gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio
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