[orthodoc]

We were SO surprised when she told us last night on the drive home from the airport ... she had mentioned on the phone recently that she wanted to talk with us this holiday, so we both went to pick her up and offered to talk on the private 90-minute drive home. You could have knocked us over with a feather when she asked our opinion on her coming back east to go to school at the nearby university (state school, excellent reputation for Fine Arts, very reasonable tuition). And then asked, without assuming anything, if it would be okay with us if she lived at home, paid us rent in cash or kind (professional cleaning), and commuted to school, 20 minutes up the highway. She told us that she's realized she needs to get back on track and pursue HER dreams and goals, not fit herself into someone else's.

The trigger is/was a good friend out west who said all the things to our daughter that parents want to say, but can't, because the risk of pushing a child away/further down a doubtful road is high. We were going to tactfully but definitely bring up the topic this holiday but the friend beat us to it. And daughter was ready to hear the friend's thoughts at that particular time ...

I can't convey how happy it makes me that she's taking her life back and looking to fulfill her dreams and potential. The past year has shown her that she wants more than cleaning houses as a career, and that minimum wage is not a living wage. She has worked hard and learned to pay her way, and found out that when two people are not on the same page and have different dreams and goals, they aren't suited for a long-term relationship. Neither one has to be a villain; they just need to follow their own paths.

I'm so very thankful.