[Gravdigr]

This doesn't really belong in "cool anything", it is decidedly uncool. What I'm talking about is throwing a ball. Or, rather the inability to throw a ball. Come on, now, it's a ball!!

I understand that some people can't throw a ball. In that situation why, WHY, would you ever agree to throw out the first pitch at a baseball game? In front of a huge crowd, on TV, even?

What makes it even worse is when it's a guy. Even worse than that, is when the person is a professional athlete.

Here's Curtis '50 Cent' Jackson, throwing out the first pitch (with added commentary):



Yeah, 'Fiddy' throws like a little girl.

Mark Wahlberg? Throws like a guy having a grand mal seizure...Carl Lewis? Throws like a little girl throwing with the wrong hand...Baba Booey? Throws like a little girl with no hands. I will bet, that somewhere in America is a little girl with no hands that throws better than Baba Booey.



Has this ever happened:

MLB: "Would you like to throw out the first pitch?"

This should the thought pattern that occurs next:

Non-thrower: Uh-oh, I bet that involves throwing a ball. I can't throw a ball. I'll embarrass myself, and my friends. In front of a crowd. In front of a potentially huge crowd. In front of millions watching on tv.

Non-thrower: "I'll do it."

Now, when this all comes together, it's arranged well ahead of time. Many schedules have to be accommodated. What I'm getting at is that these folks have plenty of time to learn to throw a ball. Do they practice? No.

Dumbasses.