[BigV]

Twil has generous tracts of land, and I enjoy roaming over them, drinking in the natural beauty.

*ahem*

And, I keep the lawn mowed. It's a good sized lawn, the front could host a vollyball court and the back could hold a tennis court and the bleachers. Late last year, the previous lawnmower died. I bought a replacement which I killed by shortening the stub of a four inch steel pipe previously used to indicate a bus stop. I'm over that now, and the mower is too. The video of me trying to unfuck the end of the shaft back into concentricity is pure tragi-comedy.

The next weekend, we went to Sears. Young people in the audience can google it. Twil basically let me pick and I picked the only Honda powered self propelled model they have. It was a few hundred dollars, waaaay out of my Goodwill budget, but Twil goes first class. I got it home, gassed it up and mowed the hell out of the lawn.

Twice.

And then I parked it under the rhodedendron while the rains came, having no room at the in, or the barn, or the carport. We had an accidental sunny day in January and she asked me, "is that the lawnmower over there?" I said yes, and moved it to the carport. Now she can't park her car as far forward as she could before, but then she just got a smaller car--problem solved.

Fast forward to today. I moved the mower to the driveway and opened the petcock, yanked the starter cord, once, twice, and rrrrRRRROOOOAAARRRR.

Third fucking pull after sitting outside since... August? Eight months? D.A.Y.U.M. No tire-inflation-fluid, no colorful language... I did put my beverage down, but that turned out to be an overabundance of caution.

Honda, I raise my glass to you! Your engineers have got *all* their shit in one sock, and I thank you for producing a first-fucking-class product, which I wholeheartedly endorse.

Kampai!