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Els and Selene, thanks for sharing these personal thoughts. I have a hard time writing about Mrs RS. But, I'll try...
As Selene mentioned, Mrs RS doesn't think intercourse is necessary, but intimacy is. She just recently realized that, for me, intimacy is really wonderful, but intercourse is needed every so often. The drought was especially pronounced for the 14 years following our second baby.
Now, we are getting "back to basics" and I'm careful to take care of my own needs, which I haven't done in the past. Throughout all this I never considered sex outside the marriage. But, in recent years, I've enjoyed other female companionship within limits. I'd rather not be intimate with any of them.
Thru that lean period, I became resigned to no sex. But, now, in general, I am taking care of my own needs more, and addressing issues inside the marriage. I'm not saying this is better or worse, just that I couldn't handle the ambiguity of an open marriage.
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