The Cellar - View Single Post - Not owning up... and how to address the upset

Cloud · 12-05-2008, 06:19 PM

blecch. bad sitch. Here are my comments:

1) the fact that this person continues to lie and act defensive means that she knows she has been caught. But if you look at it from her viewpoint--what do you do if you are caught in a lie? Maybe she didn't actually realize the significance of the fabric and started making the quilt, and then was caught. It's as hard to know what to do in that situation as your dilemma, and she has obviously decided to brazen it out.

2) Don't hold a grudge--gah! I can't stand that. But don't sweep it over the carpet either. If you want to wait until Christmas fine, but if it were me, eventually I'd have to go over there and tell her something like, "look, I know you used the fabric and were lying about it, but in the interest of preserving family harmony, I'm letting it go."

and then let it go. No matter what the sentimental signifcance of the fabric is, people and family are more important.

12-05-2008, 06:19 PM	#84
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	blecch. bad sitch. Here are my comments: 1) the fact that this person continues to lie and act defensive means that she knows she has been caught. But if you look at it from her viewpoint--what do you do if you are caught in a lie? Maybe she didn't actually realize the significance of the fabric and started making the quilt, and then was caught. It's as hard to know what to do in that situation as your dilemma, and she has obviously decided to brazen it out. 2) Don't hold a grudge--gah! I can't stand that. But don't sweep it over the carpet either. If you want to wait until Christmas fine, but if it were me, eventually I'd have to go over there and tell her something like, "look, I know you used the fabric and were lying about it, but in the interest of preserving family harmony, I'm letting it go." and then let it go. No matter what the sentimental signifcance of the fabric is, people and family are more important. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"