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10) What paid job did you have for the shortest amount of time?
I was a nanny for one day. The couple couldn't have been more stereotypical: filthy rich, wife an aging cheerleader desperate to maintain her youth, husband an aggressive Type A personality about 15 years older than she was. When I got there, she insisted I take their three daughters to the park, even though it was actively raining, and made me drive there in her huge-ass luxury SUV instead of my own vehicle. The first thing the kids did was sit down in the mud and start covering their legs like they were at the beach. Then, of course, it stopped raining, and there was no way to wash off the mud, so rather than ruin the interior of her nice car, I had them strip down to their underwear in the back fold-down area, and confined the clothes to a narrow pile as carefully as I could. When we got back to the house I ushered them straight into the bathroom and washed everything off, but the husband was not pleased to find his children half-naked and riding without seatbelts. "You really marched them in a straight line, didn't you?" Then he started questioning me about my background, and when I said I was an Austin native, he said, "Not with that accent, you're not." The wife mentioned that she'd bought some wine at the grocery store, and he just looked at the brand and snorted before leaving the room. She looked at me and said, "I know, but... I mean, look at this house." Before I left, she asked me to fix her email--this was back in the day when undeliverable messages just sat in your Outbox trying to send again and again, and she'd built up about a hundred mis-typed addresses that were throwing up individual errors every time she sent something new. Stupidly, I tried to explain why she was having the problem instead of just fixing it and claiming it was magic, and after about 20 seconds she got frustrated and shooed me away without letting me actually fix it.
I emailed about future dates, but they never responded. I suspect the wife got an earful about her terrible employee vetting skills, and either he's died of old age or he had her murdered.
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