Thread: Weird names
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Old 07-27-2015, 10:20 AM   #152
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 25,185
Limberbutt McCubbins

A candidate for president.

Let’s get two things straight about next year’s presidential election. The first is, quit whining about all those Republican candidates. Seventeen is nothing – there are already at least 459 officially registered presidential candidates. (A couple more could have signed up in the time it took you to read this sentence.) And second, not one more word about how everybody who’s running sounds the same. Are you kidding? You can vote for an anarchist or a socialist or a prohibitionist, a vermin (really, that’s his name, Vermin Supreme) or even a deity. You can vote for a cat. (Slogan: “The time is meeow!”)

“We’ve certainly heard from an ample number of candidates from a broad political spectrum,” agrees Christian Hilland, a spokesman for the Federal Election Commission. These are determinedly diplomatic words from a guy who spends his days sorting through paperwork filed by candidates whose platforms include stuff like giving every American a free pony and turning Alcatraz Island into a temple of New Age music and light shows.

Sifting through the presidential declarations filed with the FEC is a rewarding journey through, depending on how you see it, either the richness of American political diversity or the crumbling fault lines of American mental health.

COULDA gone in the 2016 Elections thread, but... not really.

More at the link.
Also a very stable genius.
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