limericks - Page 3

Lady Sidhe · 04-23-2004, 12:44 AM

Yeah, some dwellers can be rather cruel when their advice isn't considered the last word, can't they?

Sun_Sparkz · 04-23-2004, 01:02 AM

eating my sushi
it smells quite profusely
i put on my fish sauce
shove it in my mouth with force
tastes much better than meusli

Sun_Sparkz · 04-23-2004, 01:06 AM

sipping my coca cola
rotting away my molar
till last sip since first
it will quench my thirst
i hope it dont give me an ulcer

wiping my face with my hand towel
so the crumbs on my face dont look foul
i am so full of food
i dont want to seem rude
but i have to go empty my bowel

*eww!*

staceyv · 04-23-2004, 01:07 AM

i just want to get in the bed
and as soon as i lay down my head,
i just want to sleep, but the coffee, it keeps
me awake, but the man that i wed,

the man that i wed had some booze,
it's the vodka that he likes to use,
he's asleep like a baby, i'm thinking just maybe,
some alcohol i should abuse.

Sun_Sparkz · 04-23-2004, 01:14 AM

calcium and a warm shower
will help you sleep - no dont cower
listen to what i tell you
you have to believe me its true
drink milk and sleep like a flower*

[ only refers to those flowers which sleep in pm hours, all other flowers are void and will not be valid with this voucher ]

Sun_Sparkz · 04-23-2004, 01:18 AM

only 45 minuits to go
before thats the end of the show
the weekend is here
its time for us to cheer
because rum is about to flow!

Sun_Sparkz · 04-23-2004, 01:20 AM

I just brought a little new car
a Hyundai excel will go far
they tell me its crap
but I turn my back
now I can burn up the tar!!

Catwoman · 04-23-2004, 07:59 AM

There's something I just gotta tell ya, this fella -
He talks all the time about Radar
He says 'He's my guy,
I'll go get some KY'
So I told him, 'He's straight - get a Gaydar'

lumberjim · 04-23-2004, 08:07 AM

...detector

Radar · 04-23-2004, 09:21 AM

Catwoman has said that I'm gay
To that there's one thing I can say
I've got a great wife
For the rest of my life
And that is the way it will stay

Her beauty's above and beyond
We've got an unbreakable bond
She's got style and grace
And a beautiful face
So don't even try to respond

You know I'm a talented guy
But not matter how hard that you try
You've got to beware
You're so ugly you'd scare
Frankenstein if you walked by his eye

Of course I am totally straight
It's my inescapable fate
I was born that way
I'll never be gay
The opposite sex is my mate

I think your detector is broke
And points to the wrong sort of bloke
I just like the chicks
And don't want no dicks
And that my dear friends is no joke

You've told everyone you're a cat
So sleek, so sexy and all that
We know it's not true
and something's askew
'cause you're really just ugly and fat

This game is becoming a bore
and typing these poems is a chore
So I must say adieu
'cause my time here is through
I don't want to do this no more

Undertoad · 04-23-2004, 09:43 AM

Poor Radar, accused to be butch
Longing for his own sex's warm touch
When it comes to the gay
There's just one thing I'll say
Methinks thou dost protest too much

Cause the line starts to get kinda blurry
When you come across all full of worry
And you can't find a mate
You find worthy to date
So outside your own culture you scurry

Catwoman · 04-23-2004, 09:56 AM

Oh dear I think Radar's mistaken -
Thinks that I said he likes to be taken
But I said he was straight -
What a futile debate
Think the old boy just needs a good shakin'

There's something else that needs correcting
I'm accused of mistaken detecting
Told my cat-like description
Is wilful encryption
When in fact I'm incredibly sexy

Radar · 04-23-2004, 10:49 AM

Undertoad is just fucked in the head
"outside your own culture" he said
He should join the triple K
'cause the words that he say
Makes everyone wish he were dead

He tells lies about me finding dates
When in fact I had much on my plate
I turned many girls down
From all over the town
'cause I wanted to find my soul mate

I traveled all over the world
In search of the one perfect girl
Who I knew I would love
And fit me like a glove
And whose kiss would make my toes curl

Luck happened upon me one day
When my travels brought me out her way
My first reaction
Was total attraction
That has lasted to this very day

Now a geek with no girl at his place
Has the nerve to bring up her race
He'll claim it's her culture
But he's just a vulture
And his actions are quite a disgrace

This racist and stupid dumb ass
Can do nothing but whine and harass
He can't get a date
So he'll just masturbate
By sticking his dick in a bass

My wife is so great that he's pissed
He's got no one to love but his fist
Though he often would wish
That his poor little fish
Would stop wiggling around to resist

Undertoad has been schooled here today
I defend him when some say he's gay
Whether guppy or whale
The fish were not male
no matter what others might say.

dar512 · 04-23-2004, 11:07 AM

Radar's an intelligent guy
I'm sure his IQ is quite high
But his heart is so small
It's just no heart at all
So we never will see eye to eye

Lady Sidhe · 04-23-2004, 10:01 PM

Radar's just being an ass,
by jumping UT--that's so crass

On the fella's own board!
Radar's just sore,
'cause of UT's smackdown, what a gas!:p

04-23-2004, 12:44 AM	#31
Lady Sidhe That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Hammond, La. Posts: 978	Yeah, some dwellers can be rather cruel when their advice isn't considered the last word, can't they? __________________ My free will...I never leave home without it. --House Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. -Rita Rudner

04-23-2004, 01:02 AM	#32
Sun_Sparkz Has Body Temperature Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: I come from a land downunder Posts: 1,105	lunchtime limericks eating my sushi it smells quite profusely i put on my fish sauce shove it in my mouth with force tastes much better than meusli __________________ We'll never be as young as we are right now

04-23-2004, 01:06 AM	#33
Sun_Sparkz Has Body Temperature Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: I come from a land downunder Posts: 1,105	lunchtime limericks sipping my coca cola rotting away my molar till last sip since first it will quench my thirst i hope it dont give me an ulcer wiping my face with my hand towel so the crumbs on my face dont look foul i am so full of food i dont want to seem rude but i have to go empty my bowel eww! __________________ We'll never be as young as we are right now Last edited by Sun_Sparkz; 04-23-2004 at 01:09 AM.

04-23-2004, 01:14 AM	#35
Sun_Sparkz Has Body Temperature Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: I come from a land downunder Posts: 1,105	calcium and a warm shower will help you sleep - no dont cower listen to what i tell you you have to believe me its true drink milk and sleep like a flower* [ only refers to those flowers which sleep in pm hours, all other flowers are void and will not be valid with this voucher ] __________________ We'll never be as young as we are right now

04-23-2004, 01:18 AM	#36
Sun_Sparkz Has Body Temperature Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: I come from a land downunder Posts: 1,105	its Friday!! only 45 minuits to go before thats the end of the show the weekend is here its time for us to cheer because rum is about to flow! __________________ We'll never be as young as we are right now

04-23-2004, 01:07 AM	#34
staceyv Lecturer Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 927	i just want to get in the bed and as soon as i lay down my head, i just want to sleep, but the coffee, it keeps me awake, but the man that i wed, the man that i wed had some booze, it's the vodka that he likes to use, he's asleep like a baby, i'm thinking just maybe, some alcohol i should abuse.

04-23-2004, 01:20 AM	#37
Sun_Sparkz Has Body Temperature Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: I come from a land downunder Posts: 1,105	Rev Head I just brought a little new car a Hyundai excel will go far they tell me its crap but I turn my back now I can burn up the tar!! __________________ We'll never be as young as we are right now

04-23-2004, 07:59 AM	#38
Catwoman stalking a Tom Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: on the edge of the english channel Posts: 1,000	Ode to Radar There's something I just gotta tell ya, this fella - He talks all the time about Radar He says 'He's my guy, I'll go get some KY' So I told him, 'He's straight - get a Gaydar' __________________ I've decided I'm not going to have a signature anymore.

04-23-2004, 08:07 AM	#39
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	...detector __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

04-23-2004, 09:21 AM	#40
Radar Constitutional Scholar Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Ocala, FL Posts: 4,006	Catwoman has said that I'm gay To that there's one thing I can say I've got a great wife For the rest of my life And that is the way it will stay Her beauty's above and beyond We've got an unbreakable bond She's got style and grace And a beautiful face So don't even try to respond You know I'm a talented guy But not matter how hard that you try You've got to beware You're so ugly you'd scare Frankenstein if you walked by his eye Of course I am totally straight It's my inescapable fate I was born that way I'll never be gay The opposite sex is my mate I think your detector is broke And points to the wrong sort of bloke I just like the chicks And don't want no dicks And that my dear friends is no joke You've told everyone you're a cat So sleek, so sexy and all that We know it's not true and something's askew 'cause you're really just ugly and fat This game is becoming a bore and typing these poems is a chore So I must say adieu 'cause my time here is through I don't want to do this no more __________________ "I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." - George Carlin Last edited by Radar; 04-23-2004 at 09:27 AM.

04-23-2004, 09:43 AM	#41
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	Poor Radar, accused to be butch Longing for his own sex's warm touch When it comes to the gay There's just one thing I'll say Methinks thou dost protest too much Cause the line starts to get kinda blurry When you come across all full of worry And you can't find a mate You find worthy to date So outside your own culture you scurry

04-23-2004, 09:56 AM	#42
Catwoman stalking a Tom Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: on the edge of the english channel Posts: 1,000	Oh dear I think Radar's mistaken - Thinks that I said he likes to be taken But I said he was straight - What a futile debate Think the old boy just needs a good shakin' There's something else that needs correcting I'm accused of mistaken detecting Told my cat-like description Is wilful encryption When in fact I'm incredibly sexy __________________ I've decided I'm not going to have a signature anymore.

04-23-2004, 10:49 AM	#43
Radar Constitutional Scholar Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Ocala, FL Posts: 4,006	Undertoad is just fucked in the head "outside your own culture" he said He should join the triple K 'cause the words that he say Makes everyone wish he were dead He tells lies about me finding dates When in fact I had much on my plate I turned many girls down From all over the town 'cause I wanted to find my soul mate I traveled all over the world In search of the one perfect girl Who I knew I would love And fit me like a glove And whose kiss would make my toes curl Luck happened upon me one day When my travels brought me out her way My first reaction Was total attraction That has lasted to this very day Now a geek with no girl at his place Has the nerve to bring up her race He'll claim it's her culture But he's just a vulture And his actions are quite a disgrace This racist and stupid dumb ass Can do nothing but whine and harass He can't get a date So he'll just masturbate By sticking his dick in a bass My wife is so great that he's pissed He's got no one to love but his fist Though he often would wish That his poor little fish Would stop wiggling around to resist Undertoad has been schooled here today I defend him when some say he's gay Whether guppy or whale The fish were not male no matter what others might say. __________________ "I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." - George Carlin

04-23-2004, 11:07 AM	#44
dar512 dar512 is now Pete Zicato Join Date: May 2003 Location: Chicago suburb Posts: 4,968	Radar's an intelligent guy I'm sure his IQ is quite high But his heart is so small It's just no heart at all So we never will see eye to eye

04-23-2004, 10:01 PM	#45
Lady Sidhe That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Hammond, La. Posts: 978	Radar's just being an ass, by jumping UT--that's so crass On the fella's own board! Radar's just sore, 'cause of UT's smackdown, what a gas!:p __________________ My free will...I never leave home without it. --House Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. -Rita Rudner

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